Anxiety Again

I am feeling very anxious this week. B and I have not been getting along, and I am so unhappy about his situation with this girl he's dating. It seems every time he is planning to go there or she's planning to come here they are on the verge of breaking up right beforehand. I think she likes the drama, maybe likes to know he cares about her enough to continue to 'fight' for her, but I think it's ridiculous. Of course, I can't say anything to him because he'll just get mad at me. She basically hates me and I feel so detached from him and I just want him to be happy. I know I was in a bad relationship with C for so long, and I continued to let him hurt me even until recently, but I know what being continually beaten down can do to a person. I feel very alone right now, too - Christmas is coming and I'm alone, and though I don't need someone to make me feel complete, it would be nice to have someone in my life. I am not sure what I am doing wrong, or more importantly, what I am not doing right, to improve this part of my life. I think I have a lot to offer, just can't seem to figure out what to do to make someone else see it. I just don't know . . . but I don't want this anxious feeling anymore. I hate it. I cry at the drop of a hat and I can't sleep well at all. Why am a I such a tortured soul, I wonder?